I have to say this that i am extremely bothered by the many says of some people in my life but for all that it really is, i should simply just not be bother by it yet it does and it does to such an extend i feel i am so profoundly moved to renounce some parts of our own connections.
Well by being so, i am perhaps over reacting but needless to say this is something that i should point out as somewhat prudently testing in my views, my dignity and especially in my terms as i am.
I am always someone who see it as the best as i can be, and i am happiest when i am in the lit of the lime, yes it is true i can be loud and abound by my says but when i meet another as such (i realize i am mild) . . . well i turn into someone else. Is it bad that i feel the way i do when someone notoriously bitches about me and embarrasses me of all that i am in the means to so call “cover” up the envy that one might have for me?
Truth being. . . i feel better typing the latter above, but it kills me sometimes knowing that i have this such in my life that i try so hard to rid. . .
I am somehow not too bought up by friendship and i am not too warmly satisfied by this arrangement. I always thought that the distance that we had would be this one perculiar bliss in out friendship but knowing that you may be close by in the coming months really shudder my own gut.
I am really looking forward for this year to unfold but knowing that this little glitch will seal it self to my life this 2012 onwards. . . and together with it sealing it self to all that is around me, is something i shiver thinking about it. I do need to rethink my goals and my perceptions because i can no longer be the simple lad that roams the city as it is, i now need a life that i can live separate.
What i find troubling is that the fact that one can be seemingly nice and seemingly “genuine” yet deep in my gut i feel there is something a mist. Why is it that this is around me. Well i do understand that things are different now and things do progress but we will still need to accept the fact that people do have feelings and being friends doesn’t quite give you the right to just step all over me, go after anyone and everything that i have.
I can say this, i feel Really annoyed.
Maybe 2012 will be a year, i start to draw the line.
Happy 2012 to all of you, may it be blissful and joyful unlike mine, though i am hopeful it will be a good one for me if only i chose to make the right move and the right choice.
Have a Good Year ahead ^^
